Redefining Your Relationship with Change


I’ve always had a complicated relationship with change. For a long time, it was definitely a sore spot… and it still pops up in ways that can be challenging. I actually had this whole post written and finalized, and then the universe threw me a curve ball that made me re-assess all my positive, optimistic views. Then, I went to an inspirational event that made me feel like I want to change almost everything… But, despite my seemingly fluid feelings on the subject, I can definitely say that it’s only recently that I can say I have even a mildly healthy relationship with change.

In the past, I always felt like change was something forced on me. People would move away, family members were impacted by accidents, I had to switch schools when I very much liked where I was. I’ve always been good at appreciating the things around me, but that made it very difficult to leave them (regardless of if the change was voluntarily or not).

So, when my fiancé (now husband) and I were discussing moving from our hometown, it terrified me. I felt like so many things were constantly changing without my permission, and getting my feet on the ground was a constant challenge. So why, all of a sudden, was I going to choose to completely alter my world?

The interesting thing I learned from the extremely emotional choice of saying yes to moving, is that choosing to make a change is sometimes the only thing that makes you feel comfortable and in control. IMG_0511

When I decided to move I was scared, worried and terrified that I’d regret my decision to give up all the good things I already had. But, I kept asking myself, what story would I want to tell 10 years from now? What experience would make me proud of myself, excited about what I experienced, and maybe even nostalgic for the experiences I had?

Now, almost a year after moving, I realized the experience made me feel so much more comfortable with change (here are a few other things I learned). The last few months especially have thrown unexpected things at me, and those felt hard. Sometimes it’s so difficult to see the bright side when something you want is taken away, or things seem to be unfolding unfairly around you. Yet, what I’ve learned over the past year is that the best way to embrace change is to know you have choices, and know it’s always perfect. Everything that’s happening is perfect, not all change is bad, and sometimes the way to get more comfortable with the unexpected is to ask for more and trust the process.

There is such a freedom in knowing you have options, everything is working out, and tha you’re strong enough to take on the challenges that might come from unexpected changes. I hope you all get to see change as an option in your life, and aren’t afraid to say yes to the scary, new opportunities.  

Today’s Petite Power: You will find it necessary to spread your wings… You will find it necessary, if for nothing else than to feel possibility at your back – b.oakman

Redfine Relationship with Change