Why You Need to Make Your Own Rules


There is a lot of weight associated with what you “should” do.

I bet you’ve felt it.

Part of the reason is because all too often we prioritize what we “should do” over what we really want. Recently, I’ve also IMG_2288 (1)realized there can be a huge amount of guilt associated with stepping out of the box, and going against the grain of what you should do.

For example, picking a career path that isn’t “stable”.

Quitting a 9-5 job for a freelance role or to start your own business.

Booking trips instead of saving all your money.

Moving to an expensive city.

These are all things I’ve done that went against the grain of what I “should” do. And I bet you can relate to at least one.

Making the decision to do each one of these things was tough. Every single time. Because I didn’t understand all the mixed emotions that came with each choice.

Deep down I’d know what I wanted to pick. What felt right to me. I was always (pretty) sure that I wanted it. But it wasn’t a blissful, easy, always-exciting experience that I’d pictured. And recently, I learned some of the conflict was because of guilt.

I usually knew what people wanted me to do. What was “logical” and “responsible” and wouldn’t stress people out or make them worry. And if I picked something that the general population didn’t like, a part of me felt guilty because I was perfectly capable of doing what they wanted. I knew how, and I could make it happen. I just didn’t.

So I lived that way for a long time, trying to impress other people and make them happy. I could almost always do it, but it was exhausting.

Eventually the heavy feeling of responsibility caught up to me.

Even the things that I thought I wanted got heavy, and I felt like I needed permission to let them go.

I’m here to say, loud and clear, that I’m letting it go. I deserve what I want, what feels good, a life that makes me happy. And you do too. Find a way to put that heavy weight down gently, and invite in the fun, light, exciting things that have been whispering to you for a while.

This week, in honor of this change and realization, I’m making my own rules. Every morning when I wake up I’m picking a rule that feels good to me. And I’m letting it trump all other rules.

Maybe I’ll wear an outfit that I’ve been too self-conscious to wear. Maybe I’ll have a dance party in my living room as my workout. I have no clue, but every day I’m going to consciously pick something that feels fun and joyful. And that’s pretty exciting.

I hope you’ll join me, and that this is as powerful for you as I know it will be for me.

Today’s Petite Power: I write my own rules, and have the power to re-write them at any time.

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